22 Funny New Year Poems

Table of Contents

• Reflections on the Passage of Time
• New Year’s Resolutions, Trials and Humor
• Financial Funnies in the New Year
• A Humorous Look at the Year Ahead
• Short Humorous New Year Poems

Reflections on the Passage of Time

This section offers witty reflections on how quickly time passes, reminding us to find humor in the fleeting nature of life.



1. The Years Go By
   Poet: Catherine Pulsifer
   
   Where do the years go, my dear, I wonder,
   Do they vanish in a cosmic blunder?
   Like socks that vanish from the dryer's heat,
   The years go missing, vanishing complete.
   
   Yet still we say Happy New Year! with cheer,
   As though it's victory, not loss we hear.
   Perhaps, my dear, it’s simply our way
   Of embracing change and finding joy each day.




New Year Quotes



2. New Year’s Clockwork
   Poet: Catherine Pulsifer
   
   The clock strikes twelve, the ball descends,
   Another year begins, my friends!
   But wasn’t it just yesterday,
   We cheered in last year’s grand display?
   
   Time’s a trickster, quick and sly,
   A calendar thief who zooms right by.
   One moment here, the next it’s gone,
   Where did the past twelve months move on?
   
   Yet let’s not mourn the time we lose,
   Instead, we’ll laugh and share our news.
   For while the years may sprint and dart,
   Humor keeps the youth in heart!




3. Blink
   Poet: Catherine Pulsifer
   
   Another year has come and gone,
   Time flies by — blink, it's all gone!
   We plan, we dream, and then, we see,
   It's New Year's Eve again, already!
   So laugh, enjoy, and take it slow,
   Life's fleeting moments, let them flow.





New Year’s Resolutions, Trials and Humor

These poems poke fun at the universal struggle of sticking to New Year’s resolutions, with relatable and lighthearted humor.



4. Do I Make A New Year's Resolution
   Poet: Catherine Pulsifer
   
   On New Year's Eve, the clock strikes twelve,
   I make resolutions all by myself.
   To change my ways and start anew,
   But deep down I know it won't come true.
   
   I vow to exercise, hit the gym each day,
   Yet my couch becomes my permanent stay.
   My resolution blues, they make me sigh,
   For once again, it was all a lie.




5. Resolution Confusion
   Poet: Catherine Pulsifer
   
   This year I’ll jog, I’ll eat no pie,
   I’ll wake at dawn and touch the sky!
   But wait, is that leftover cake?
   Perhaps these goals were a mistake.
   
   The gym’s a thought — oh, maybe not,
   This couch is such a comfy spot.
   So here’s my plan, I’ll keep it true:
   Next year, I’ll resolve to stick to a few!





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More poems to start your year:

Inspirational Poems For The New Year

New Year Poems

New Year Love Poems

Christian New Year Poems



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6. I Promised
   Poet: Catherine Pulsifer
   
   I promised this year I'd get in shape,
   No more cookies, no more cake!
   But here I am, it's just day three,
   And I’m already sneaking snacks, you see!
   I’ll try again, come next week,
   But first, let's finish this chocolate treat!





Financial Funnies in the New Year

Laugh at the financial woes of the post-holiday season with these funny takes on New Year budgeting struggles.



7. The Bills Roll In
   Poet: Catherine Pulsifer
   
   Christmas is over, New Year is here,
   But the bills start rolling in, oh dear, oh dear!
   Santa’s gifts and decorations were grand,
   Now it's time to pay, with wallet in hand.
   
   Credit cards groaning with weight and strain,
   Oh, this new year's beginning feels like a pain!
   Yet let’s laugh at this financial rhyme,
   For humor is what makes it all fine.




Funny Quotes



8. New Year, Same Wallet
   Poet: Catherine Pulsifer
   
   The gifts were grand, the feast was fine,
   Now my bank account’s on a steady decline.
   The credit card groans, "Oh, what a spree!"
   As I clutch my coffee — can't afford the fee.
   
   Budget plans? Oh, they sound so sweet,
   Until January’s bills knock me off my feet.
   But hey, who needs savings? It’s all in good cheer!
   Let’s just start fresh - maybe next year!





A Humorous Look at the Year Ahead

Explore a whimsical and humorous perspective on the months ahead, capturing the quirks and surprises each one brings.



9. The Clock Strikes Midnight
   Poet: Catherine Pulsifer
   
   As the clock strikes midnight, we cheer,
   Happy New Year, the day is here!
   But wait, what's this I fear?
   12 months ahead, and we're one year older, dear!
   
   January brings resolutions anew,
   February's chocolates make us forget a few.
   March comes in like a lion, rawr!
   April fools us with pranks galore!
   
   May makes us wonder where time goes,
   June brings summer, sunburns and woes.
   July has fireworks lighting up the sky,
   Oh my, oh my, how time does fly!
   
   So here's to the year that lies ahead,
   Let's face it with laughter instead.
   With humor as our guiding light,
   We'll tackle each day with all our might!




New Year Toasts



10. Month by Month Madness
    Poet: Catherine Pulsifer
    
    January’s cold, with frost in the air,
    February’s chocolates ease the despair.
    March winds howl, they blow and they bite,
    April fools us with jokes (not always polite).
    
    May blooms flowers, but allergies too,
    June brings the sun — and a burn or two.
    July has fireworks lighting the night,
    August melts us with heat’s delight.
    
    September pencils, October’s a scare,
    November’s turkeys fill the air.
    December wraps it in glittery cheer —
    And suddenly, poof, it’s another new year!




11. What's Next
    Poet: Catherine Pulsifer
    
    The year ahead is full of cheer,
    But I’m already thinking, "What’s next, dear?"
    In January, I'll clean the house,
    By February, I'll binge-watch on the couch!
    March will come with good intent,
    Then April brings my chocolate event!
    The months ahead? Full of plans galore -
    But let’s be honest, I've done this before!





Short Humorous New Year Poems

Short, punchy, and full of laughs, this section features quick poems to bring a smile to your face as the New Year begins.



12. New Year's resolutions, they say,
    We make them, then they fade away.
    But this year, I will do my best,
    To keep them all, and pass the test!




13. 
    New Year's Resolutions Poems




14. As the clock strikes midnight, we cheer,
    But by 12:01, I'm already here.
    Eating snacks, what can I say?
    New Year's diet starts another day!




15. Out with the old, in with the new,
    My alarm clock's ringing, oh, if I only knew.
    Waking up early, that was the plan,
    But my bed's so cozy, I'm a big fan!




16. Fireworks in the sky so bright,
    But I'm in my PJs, a comfy sight.
    Who needs parties, all that fuss?
    New Year's Eve is for Netflix and us!




17. Resolutions made, a lengthy list,
    But by January's end, they're often missed.
    So this year, I've made a new decree,
    I'll keep my resolutions, I won't forget quickly.




18. 
    Poems About New Year's Eve




19. In the gym, the place is packed,
    New Year's resolutions, they're all attacked.
    But I'm on the couch, chips in hand,
    Watching TV, oh, ain't life grand?




20. New Year's Day, a fresh start they say,
    But I'll snooze my alarm, that's the way.
    No early riser, no morning run,
    But a new day to have fun!




21. January's here, it's cold and gray,
    But I've got hot cocoa, so I'll be okay.
    No diets for me, that's the rule,
    I'll eat marshmallows until I'm full!




22. Another year, it's time to begin,
    But I'll take it slow, with a grin.
    No rush, no stress, just laughter and cheer,
    I will look forward with no fear!

• Month Poems
• Funny Thanksgiving Poems
• Funny Birthday Poems
• Funny Christmas Poems
• Funny Quotes About Life
• Funny Poems About Life
• Funny Winter Poems